ZoomConcept Reviews
Serious Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 yes many a time, and I don't need to by your book, you can generally see it someone's eyes, or hear it in their tone of voice Critical Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 Arial - that's your logo? 2 Impact yet another crap font 3 this intro is BAD, not BAD ASS, just BAD Summary:
Gabriel
I'm sorry, but this is atrocious, and I haven't even started on the design yet, I HAD to read your intro to get a better idea, and to be honest I am amazed that you want people to buy a book that you have written, based on the intro. I'll use notes...
Seriously Gabriel this is really BAD... However, if you are to continue with this, you need to work out a few things, like:
- WHY? Why would anyone want to buy this book? WHO? Who is your target audience? WHAT? What is the benefit to people to buy this book from you? HOW? How can you design this pag so that it turns into sales, and not bounces?
Personally I suggest you hire a designer, that would be my first suggestion. You need a menu structure, a CTA and it needs to be above the fold....
And for god's sake get some advice on the intro...
Minor Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 What are these for? 2 Do you need this? 3 Don't like this bar think, could just be me though 4 Heading? 5 Huh? 6 NO! don't start with this, build trust! Just remove this Serious Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 This looks like a warning, not something that would make me want to read something at all Critical Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 HOLY COW. Way too much text. Nobody will look at this much text and want to read it unless they're REALLY interested in your product. This should make people really interested, not assume that they are. Try to say some of this stuff with images, different sections of text with headings etc New Idea on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 Nice Summary:
It needs some work, Right now it's just a single page site so no need for navigation. Just break up all that text
Summary:
Unable to evaluate the design when there is none. It's just text and it is there very much. No one will want to read. You could atleast play with graphic elements that are there. It's almost too easy and boring. Too much too much text.
good luck
Summary:
First off, there isnt any visual hierarchy (except for the logo)
For a squeeze page, if you want me to buy your product, you need to make me feel excited.
Guide my eyes with visuals. (images, videos, etc)
Tell me whats important, in big bold letters. once you catch my attention with that, then (and only then) will i be willing to read deeper into that section.
Serious Problem Design
Just search in Google for "Ebook Salesletter Design" to find some good examples of good Ebook Salesletter Designs. This one is really awful to look at.Critical Problem Headline
Change the Headline Text, it's not very good am compelling.New Idea Picture of the Ebook
Where is the Picture of the Ebook you want to sell? Customers need a picture of the product.Summary:
You should really make a new Design. This one will not sell any Ebooks or anything else. User's will click away in 1 second because they can't find Product Photos, the Headlines are bad and the Design has a bad Usability!
Minor Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 having words "truth" and "bad" so close is probably not a good thing regarding your product, although I know what you try the communicate. Serious Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 This "in your face" red looks terrible Positive Feature long sales letters work New Idea I would work on some design features that would reassure clients like serif fonts. Just to give the feel of legibility Summary:
Where's the call to action?
Darken the gray font.
What's th strategy behind this whole design? Sell e-books?
Graphics improve readership.--Add some.
Minor Problem on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 Navigation / top of text graphic impacting on each other. Poor layout. Other on http://www.human-lie-detector.com 1 Why should I believe this claim? Any testimonials? I am already suspicious of anyone who claims mighty success without evidence. 2 Question mark? 3 Negative emphasis - 'not this or that' 4 Uh-oh - what a waste of web page real estate. You often don't have time to go through this. You can do it elsewhere on the site if necessary. When I get to your page I want to see the book and know immediately what it does for me and why I would be foolish not to buy it straight away. Summary:
For any reviewer it is important to divorce what it is that a site is trying to sell/promote/encourage from the way that it is trying to do it. Once that separation is made it becomes easier to give a more balanced and measured review. Not that such isolation helps much in this case. Sadly the page seems to ignore many well-documented and tried and tested tenets of design and layout. Graphical interest? none Calls to action? none Page hierarchy? hardly Verbosity/hectoring/lecturing? plenty
Sorry, but, whatever your message/pitch/product it is first important to take on either basic design fundamentals oneself or hire somebody who already has them. In general there is a defensive tone to the prose (of which there is way too much) - 'I am not this, the book is not that'. Belive in what you are selling/promoting and tell people what's great about you and it. If this is to be re-worked then I wish you luck with the project - but, like this, it won't fly.
