ZoomConcept Reviews
Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_01.jpg 1 PRINT TREATMENT - make this a UV overlay, and every 4th or 5th square on the cover, that will make it stand out from the crowd. Also remove the white from the logo Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_02.jpg 1 why is this empty? 2 move this into the empty space, and make it bigger! Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_03.jpg 1 Also move it over here so there's no wasted space Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_05.jpg 1 Think about colors 2 yuck, I hate stock photography - use a shot of the office in a buzz state Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_06.jpg 1 there's no room to breathe up here 2 yet heaps here Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_07.jpg 1 italics - NO Serious Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_04.jpg 1 Remove it, as it is there are too many dots, and a space 2 Logo needs more room to breathe, make it smaller and center it within the box 3 Typography, this is the prime opportunity to show off that you are a professional company and know how to use Typography as a treatment, this unfortunately is not helping you 4 Italics should never be used as a Headings in Print Typography unless you have designed it in WORD, and even so the designer should have a slap on the hand! Serious Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_08.jpg 1 NO! Stock yuck, at least if you are going to use stock make it more personal, like an office shot of people Serious Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_09.jpg 1 still no room 2 but loads here Critical Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_03.jpg 1 this is the contents, tell the people it's the contents, keep it simple, also lose the italic bold numbers I would suggest something like this: .......................1 it look's more professional, and yet classy Summary:
Overall there are a couple of issues that I have pointed out, I think it's more that lack of typography, as other than that it's going to be good, I like the idea of the bigger and smaller shots on the case studies pages.
You need to change the contents page, and the stock photography, and the typography and look at spacing, other than that it's looking good!
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Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_01.jpg 1 that's a whole lotta blue............. Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_02.jpg 1 whole lotta emptiness going on? Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_03.jpg 1 stay consistent with the caps on the start of each word Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_04.jpg 1 title text is too close to the header Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_10.jpg 1 just pointing out how many time the phrase "we design & develop" is thrown out there... we get it already! :-) Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_11.jpg 1 again..."we developed" Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_13.jpg 1 and again...."we developed" Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_14.jpg 1 and again...."we created" Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_16.jpg 1 and again...."we developed" Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_17.jpg 1 wow...and again...."we designed & developed" Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_20.jpg 1 "ask our clients" , maybe term as "see what some of our clients have to say...." and show more than one quote. 2 don't really care for this mustard color Serious Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_06.jpg 1 the left alignment on each of the pages is different. needs to be consistent. Summary:
Hello - Overall - it looks like a typical ppt presentation. I do think that on the case study pages a lot of the copy is too repetitive. I've added notes to my comments.... To answers to your questions: 1. Do you like the cover? I think the logo should be larger on the page, it seems to be getting lost in the sea of blue.
- What do you think about the page titles and the table of contents? The TOC is awkward and needs padding. I agree with Aaran on losing the italics.
- Do you like the two stock images used? The stock images look 'hoakie' . more personalized actual photos of your team may be better.
- Do you think that the language/tone is good? I think the tone is fine, a little repetitive though. The "we design & develop" is said way too many times throughout the presentation.
- Is the content too repetitive or just right? already said I think its too repetitive...
- Do you think that page six is unnecessary and should be removed? Yes
Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_03.jpg 1 Try a grid with rows for the TOC - and pick up on the blue banner. Use alternate repeating rows (with the row color a 10% shade of the blue) Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_06.jpg 1 Two column would look better Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_07.jpg 1 Two column Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_11.jpg 1 (Case study = bold -- "Document Rights" = not Bold) Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_13.jpg 1 Move up slightly - to create some contrast movement Minor Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_15.jpg 1 Move up Serious Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_04.jpg 1 Try two columns (see uploaded attachment) Serious Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_20.jpg 1 Doesn't fit rest of the document Critical Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_10.jpg 1 Switch the hierarchy (Case study = bold -- "Today's Document" = not Bold) Positive Feature on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_01.jpg 1 Nice contrasting background Positive Feature on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_05.jpg 1 Great page! Positive Feature on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_08.jpg 1 Great illustration Positive Feature on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_09.jpg 1 Great... Positive Feature on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_11.jpg 1 Nice... Positive Feature on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_12.jpg 1 Great Summary:
This is a great capabilities brochure:
- consider making some minor changes I've indicated
- Explore using a page level grid to drive consistency within the document
Refer to some inspiration examples for stylistic ideas for "column one" type treatment
I really think your work is amazing!
Attached Files:
Serious Problem on Viderity-CapPres3_Page_06.jpg 1 poor design
Aaran, thank you very much for your thorough review!
I just picked up my copy of The Elements of Style and every heading in there is in italics. In some designers' opinion, italics make an excellent choice for level 3 or 4 headings. I wouldn't tend to use them for top level headings though.